A Perfect Stranger

June 21, 2012

8:16 pm

“What do you want from me? Why have you tied me like this?” with this question silence filled the whole room. Only because I had to stop my chainsaw to hear what John was asking.

I looked at him, stretched my lips and smiled. After smiling like this for 2 minutes I realized it was not making him happy so I started blinking my eyes too.

 “Let’s play a game. A Guess-Guess game” I replied.

”After tying you like this I start my chainsaw and start proceeding towards you. Now you tell me why I have tied you like this?” I started blinking faster.

4:30 pm, same day

Just like everyday I went to central park for a morning walk. After few rounds I headed to my favorite bench and found a man sitting on it. I stood in front of him with my hands crossed. He was busy in reading a newspaper. He soon noticed me and shifted a little to his right to give me enough space to sit. But I was still standing.

“You can sit here. It’s a lot of space vacant now.” he said.

“It’s my bench. You go and sit somewhere else.” I commanded him in an angry tone.

“It’s a public bench my friend. Anybody can sit here.” He replied in a little frightening pitch.

“Do not panic.” I chuckled. “I was just mocking you. You just called me a friend, so what is mine is yours too.” I said and sat next to him.

He again got busy in reading his newspaper.

“You first make friends and then ignore them like this?” I asked.

“Oh! Please forgive me. My name is John” He smiled and put the newspaper on the bench.

“So where do you live?” I asked.

“Not far. It’s just a five minutes walking distance from here.”

“So let’s have dinner together at your home” I winked at him.

“You are mocking me again, aren’t you?” He laughed.

“No.” I made a straight face.

He stopped laughing.

“I do not know you. How can I invite you for dinner?” He said with a surprised look.

“I thought we have become friends. You just said so, didn’t you?” I moved forward to give him a hug but he leaned back and ignored.

“I have a habit of saying ‘my friend’ to everybody. It does not mean I will call everyone home for dinner.” Now he was raging with anger.

“We have just met. Relations take time to set its roots.” I replied

“I do not want to keep any relation with you.” He stood up and started walking away.

I held his hand and pulled down back to the bench.

“Do you mean I will always remain a perfect stranger to you? You will completely forget me after a few days?  I asked

“It is always better to forget people like you.” he answered

8:30 pm, same day

There was blood everywhere.

I was still able to see his fingers vibrating. Next turn was his feet’s.

He was crying in pain. But he didn’t know that there isn’t anybody to listen to his squalls.

“What have I done?” he asked while crying, but by then I had her legs amputated.

His screams echoed all over in the room.

“Your head is next.” I showed all the teeth which can be visible in a single time.

“Please don’t do that. Atleast tell me my mistake before I die.” He requested and tried to join hands with no hands.

But before he could even try doing that, I chopped his head in half.

“Your last wish is heard." I said. "I want to be famous. And you intended to remain a perfect stranger.” I answered.
"And to be famous what is the most important thing?" I continued, "tell me? now you won't shout, will you? you half headed dumb!!." The anger was dominating me by then.
"The most important thing is that everybody knows you." I continued, "And for that I will kill every perfect stranger on earth." and I winked once again.

BlueBerries

I quickly dialed 100. Police took half an hour to reach. My wife was crying and was getting worse every minute. Police asked a few basic questions from both of us as soon as it entered. And I as usual gave all the correct answers. 

They then started their customary work. It was mayhem everywhere. My house was soon full of dog’s shit. They started taking pictures, following foot prints, spraying all over finding finger prints, searching all over and God know what else. At last they took our deposition and were gone as soon as they came.

Next day they arrived again, and ofcourse without notifying. But this time for taking my statement only. I got scared. Why only me?  

The sub inspector who was “interrogating” me had a badge hanging around his chest with his name written on it which said Pankaj Joshi. I thought for a moment but preferred calling him with his rank only.

“Inspector saab! Is everything al-al-al-right?” I asked with a stammering voice.
“Yes, don’t panic. We have lost your written statement. That’s all.” He smiled and put his hand on my shoulder.

I sighed in relief and told him what was true, exactly the same I said the previous day.

“As everyday routine, we both went to bed at 11 o clock” I started. “I have a habit to wake up at 4 am. I then drink a glass of water and go back to sleep. But when I woke up last night and went straight away to the refrigerator, I saw drawing room’s window was smashed. I slowly picked up my cricket bat and switched on the light. I was shocked at what I was looking. My whole house was like a mess. I quickly ran towards my almirah, opened my safe to check, and as anticipated, whole gold and cash was gone. I woke up my wife. We both looked everywhere but gold and cash was nowhere. And that is when I called you at 6 am.”

The moment I completed my statement, he gave me a tight slap on my face.

“What is this non sense?” my wife shouted in anger.

“Thieves should be treated like this Madam Ji.” He replied.

“Are you kidding me?” this time she shouted even louder.

“It’s a hoax. I have done nothing darling?” I announced.

And that is when I was slapped on the second cheek as well.

I fell unconscious on the floor. When I woke up, my wife was fighting with the Sub Inspector. She was not letting him speak and kept on shouting on him.

Police took me and my wife to the police station They asked me why I stole all my gold and cash. But I rather cross fired asking them to prove if I have stolen it.

“We searched all over your house.” Pankaj Joshi started. “We took finger prints from different places. We didn’t find any finger print of any other person. There were just your fingers prints everywhere even on almirah and the safe.”

“Gloves shall be worn by thieves, Inspector saab. You are trapping me in the wrong charges.” I started yelling on him.

“When we searched the backyard, we found this.” He opened a drawer and pulled out a necklace. It was our necklace. “this also has your finger prints on it, Mr.”

“Maybe they tried to escape from the backdoor when they must have mistakenly dropped this necklace. And as far as I remember this is same necklace I put on my wife with my own hands two days ago.” I tried to clear the entire situation.

“We not even found this necklace but all the cash and gold hidden in your backyard.” This time he stood up from his chair.

“How would I know sir, how all this was in my backyard?” I said nervously. I was sweating badly this time. They were clearly trapping on wrong charges.

“This could be any of my enemy’s tricks to fix me up.” I exclaimed. “The thieves may have deliberately left the money behind.” This time I dared to raise my voice.

“As per the statement of your wife, she had not seen this necklace since a year. You both never took it out of your safe.”

I looked at my wife; she was looking at me full of anger. I started crying. I was caught.

“And she has also told us that at night she safely kept the remaining cup of her favorite blueberry ice cream in the freezer before going to sleep, which she didn’t find in there in the morning.” 
“Maybe the thieves…” I just started when Sub Inspector stopped me.

“May be you fed your wife her favorite blueberry ice cream with your own hands last night and maybe thieves who were wearing gloves ate the remaining ice cream because they were feeling hungry at 3 am in the morning.”

"So you did all this just because you ate my  favorite blueberry ice cream?" she shouted so loudly that everybody in the police station started looking at us."and how dare you by the way?"
 Sub inspector was smiling but I will not be able to look into my wife’s eyes any more.

Delusional Diary

Diary 15/June/12

Dear Diary,

Today was our 11^th anniversary. I was very happy today, infact I still am. This day has always been the happiest day in my life and will always be.

In the whole year, this is the only day when I see sun rising up and dominating its orange color over the blue sky. It is not because I wake up early but because I never sleep the night before.

You would ask why? It is because of the fear of waking up at 11 am as usual. And the bigger fear of making her upset if I reach late. And the biggest fear of breaking my promise and making her wait for hours. I never let this happen with her - on our anniversary.

I started my day doing all the usual errands and eventually I got ready on time. It was a very hard working task to do though. I first tried to match shirt and trousers from my room-mate’s almirah. I then wore his most expensive perfume specially going into the washroom as to not to risk his sleep. I then slowly and smartly picked his new woodland shoes from under his bed. And last but not the least, the most important task was to take out money from his wallet, little enough as not to make him realize, and large enough to buy a sweet and good gift for her. And let me tell you it is the toughest calculation in the world.

After one hour, she picked me from outside my PG, and then we went straight away to GIP. She was insisting on going somewhere else, as that was the only place we always meet. But I had no choice; I only had discount coupons of GIP food court.

I loved the music player installed in her new Honda City. I played all my favorite tracks till we reached our destination.

She was looking very beautiful and gorgeous as ever. I felt very jealous when every single guy turned and looked back at her.

Here is the sad part. She had to go early this time. She said that few relatives are coming over for lunch. We didn’t spend much time together but every single second with her was worth.

We did little supper together, did few good talks. And then we did what I was waiting for long. I looked in her eyes, she looked in my eyes, but whenever our eyes met, she turned her face. She is a very shy girl and that’s the best part in her which I love.

Then her phone rang and she asked to leave. It was such a strong reason that I was not able to ask her to stay for little more time.

Same as every year, she denied taking my gift. She thinks that gifts are just a formality. Real gift is the ‘real love’ which one should give. I would have left the gift in her car, but I later thought that her thinking is also right. I rather should prove my real love for her than giving gifts like these. And I brought the gift back home. After all she did not open the gift to see what’s in it. So I can gift her the same present next year. And ofcourse I will be spared with all those tricky calculations next year. *wink*

She was getting late so wasn’t able to drop me back. It was a genuine reason, I should not think it as being rude and lack of etiquettes.

While we were doing see off, I had tears in my eyes. I wanted her to stay. I wanted to just look in her deep brown eyes for hours. Inside I knew it was not possible.

She waved and went. I stood there for a little more time expecting her to come back and say that she was kidding and was pulling my leg. But it didn’t happen.

But inside I knew that she will come back and we will meet again.

One year later.